Happy Saturday Everyone!
This week I had another melt down. Norman has been on extra pain medication for just over a week. I thought it was helping him and I still believe it is helping him but I do think the pain is getting worse. Mornings are his worse. He stays in bed all night even when the other dogs get me up at 2:30 in the morning to go outside he stays in bed because I think it is less painful to stay in bed then it is to jump off the bed and walk down the dreaded steps. Wednesday morning was sad, going down the steps he just had this look on his face that I couldn’t take. I really thought I would need to have the talk with John when he came home from work. I needed to go to Grandma’s house (which is around the block) to help her call in her pacemaker reading so I loaded up Norman and took him with so we could go spend some alone time in a place I go to think.
The place I go to is a hidden place on my brother and my property where we laid our parents ashes to rest. This property used to be our dads then our moms now it is ours. Many pets are also buried here. This is also a place where Grandma goes to think (dad’s mom) so I go there also for guidance. I bought my camera thinking this was the last photo shoot I was going to have with my buddy.
Walking around sniffing out all the good smells.
Follow me mom, I know the way.
This road was traveled many a times.
Your not by my side mom, hurry up and get up here.
Really, can you hurry up and be by my side?
I will turn back and come to your side.
A little sniff along the way.
I think I see it over there!
I think I smell it.
The sheer beauty of life.
The sheer beauty of love.
A bond neither life nor death can break.
We’re here!
Norman was so full of life at our special spot. He was happy and that made me happy. He even sniffed around enough to find a treasure to show he still has it.
Still can sniff up a pheasant feather.
John came home and I told him I thought we would have to make a decision soon but then Norman was feeling better. I’m afraid the end is near. So many clients ask me when is it time and I always have a answer for them which is when the bad days out number the good days it is time. So does that mean when I cry more days then not is it time?
“The clock is running. Make the most of today. Time waits for no man. Yesterday is history. Tomorrow is a mystery. Today is a gift. That’s why it is called the present.”
Norman is the best present life could of given me!
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That place is truly special.It made Norman walk to the memorable spot. That’s my mom’s favorite quote … she always recite that to my dad. Precious smiling photos of Norman. Sending you Lots of Golden LOVE. Lots of Golden Woofs, Sugar
Oh Sugar that was so special, thank you for sharing it with me. You mom was a wise strong woman. Bless you!
I love how you took him to your special spot, you can tell he enjoyed it too by the pictures. I think it’s hard to know when the time is right and you have to go with your heart.
I’m here if you need to ‘talk.’
((HUGS))
Thank you so much Jodi, you are such a great friend.
If this happens to be your last outing with Norman it certainly was one that he enjoyed – that big smile on his face tells you he’s still in it, still joyful, still happy to pick up a stick. I feel your agony about the decision, it’s the hardest one to make because it breaks your heart so much. Here’s what my vet said to me that helped me make the decision about Becca…”when your dog is terminal (as Becca was), and in pain, you can’t be too early…but you can be too late”. That was hard to hear, but it helped me do what was right for Becca, not what was right for me. Sending hugs for you and for Norman.
Thank you, Thank you for your thoughts. Thanks for sharing what your vet told you, it is so true and I need to listen to that!
I woke up this morning thinking about Otter and then thinking about Norman… I can relate with you! love the new photos!
Thank you Kathy, I hope Otter is well.
I’m so sorry:( I don’t have any words of wisdom. I know how hard this is but I do know that you will know when it is time. Norman is so lucky and he looks happy in those pictures at your special place. Seize the day. Sending lots of hugs.
Thank you for your hugs lisa and for being there, you don’t have to have words of wisdom I know you are with me.
I’m so happy to hear he cheered up after his walk to your special spot. It sure sounds like a sign he’s not quite ready yet, but of course, I’m not there to see him every day as you are. I’m so sorry that it’s so hard to know, but I believe if you follow you’re heart, you will know…
If he is only in major pain when he first gets up but then perks up the rest of the day, that sounds like a good sign. Does he get his pain meds once or twice a day? I’m wondering if it could be wearing off, or maybe his bed is no longer comfortable? Not sure how your house is set up, but is there a way he could sleep downstairs and not have to go up and down them for a while. Even if you camped out with him?
Anyway, those are just a few things that sprang to my mind, you probably already considered them all, but I figured I’d share just in case. My thoughts are with you.
Thank you for sharing your thoughts they are always welcome. Norman is on Rimadyl twice a day along with Gabapentin twice a day and tramadol as needed. He is just so damn happy, doesn’t even act like anything is wrong until his leg is bothering him then it is only for a small time then he is back to his cheerful self. And yes I can sleep down stairs and will when the time comes.
I am glad you had some nice time alone together and I love the pictures.
It is always hard to know when it is time because brave doggies don’t let us see. Our Gordie (the golden before Thunder) would never leave us. It was hard to know when it was time to let him go.
Thank you Linda, those darn chessies are just so damn strong.
Hi Y’all,
When Candy (see Memories page on Hawk’s blog) got to the point that she didn’t want to do the steps, I stayed in our office with her, where she spent her days, and I slept in a recliner. (there were no steps for her to get in and out) Every other night we ran a jug into her. When she got to the point that she couldn’t squat without falling over (to do her business) we had to call our vet who came to our house and put her to sleep on her bed in front of the fireplace.
Candy took a piece of my heart and hubby’s heart with her. We still tear up thinking of her…but we sometimes feel we tried to keep her going too long…It’s never easy.
Let me share one thing with everyone…as we’ve aged more and more family and friends have passed away…human ones that is…we’ve lost a number of close friends in the last couple of years, most to cancer. One thing they all had in common was that they reach a point when they just want “it to be over”. When I was young I lost a close friend to breast cancer and when it became too much those were her words too. With a pawed friend all you can do is watch the eyes…the pleading look in the eyes…when they no longer want to go with you anywhere and give you that pleading look…
Sorry to be so wordy.
BrownDog’s Human
Thank you so much Hawk for stopping by and for your story about Candy, I checked out her memory page and what a love. I bet your humans miss her dearly. You can be wordy anytime, I am thankful for friends like you to help me though this difficult time. Hugs
Oh Norman, I send lots of puppy love and healing energy to yooowooowooooo!
Thank you KU, I needed some of this today.
my heart is just breaking for you. Norman will let you know when it is time. (((((hugs))))
Thank you Caren, hugs back you are great for checking in.
My heart hurts reading this ..I so clearly remember the last walk I ever was able to take with Bruno..He did his best to show joy, but i could tell it was the last one …Edie Jarolim is going through this right now and has been writing some great posts over on her blog http://willmydoghateme.com/ There’s been great discussion on how to know when it’s time and you might find some wisdom or support there…I have tears as I’m typing this..Bless you Norman…Your gray muzzle and strong spirit are touching me deeply today
Thank you for sharing the link, I have it bookmarked and will check it out. Thank you so much for caring and sharing your thoughts. Means the world to me.
We have spoken of our dogs and I know you know I feel… I do think that it a most wonderful thing to let our dogs go in dignity and have their *last* outing be the best possible,.. Like you and Norman Scout and I went to a place that means a lot to us Scout got to do her last *retrieve* I am good with my decision as I would not want to be an hour too late. We all have to do what we feel is the best for our beloved dogs.. Sometimes the husbands just want to keep them longer so we women have to be the stronger… It was like this here anyway.
doG Bless Norman and you and your husband and Scout will be there to greet him along with all the wonderful dogs there….
Thank you Paulette for your thoughts, I am thinking of you too and hoping all is alright. I know Scout is waiting for Norman and will show him the ropes, that makes it easier.
Norman looks so happy in the photos. What a special walk for the two of you.
When our Abby was getting worse lots of folks said, she’ll give you The Look when she’s done fighting. On her last day, I wasn’t sure. She seemed okay, then she’d not seem okay. I was going back and forth, not sure what to do, and then she was resting and I went in to check on her and she definitely gave me The Look. Her eyes really told me she was done fighting. After that, she still did perk up again. Was eating treats, wagging her tail, etc., but it was time. I think it is better to let them go a wee bit early, than a bit late.
Hang in there. Keeping you all in our thoughts. I know how hard this time is!
Jackie, thank you so much for stopping by and sharing your story and thoughts. I so much needed this.
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My heart goes out to you. You’re facing the biggest and hardest responsibility we have to our dogs. I agree with what some have said: there’s a look. I feel like I should say more, but even though its been almost a year since Lucy and a little over a year since Tucker… it all still feels too fresh to talk about.
So sorry Sue for your losses. It is never easy and I bet the time does still feel so fresh.